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  #1  
Old 05-10-2009, 07:56 PM
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lilyOhio lilyOhio is offline
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Default going to enlist, help with parents

so i think i have made up my mind to enlist. i am going to wait till the end of summer to actually sign everything, give myself time to finish school and have some time off, all that good stuff. but i am debating whether to tell my parents before or after. they know i am considering it, and they are skeptical and concerned, to say the least. i promised my dad i would wait to make a decision, but i think i am going back to the recruiter after graduation in june and tell him i want to seriously start the enlistment process.

should i tell them now and have them try to convince me not to, or just do it and tell them i am a soldier once i have sworn in? i am sure they will support me no matter what i do, but i know they think i am taking the "easy way out" which i don't see as the case at all. i just need a change in my life and to feel like i am doing something with myself. if i don't join i will be one of the thousands of '09 grads moving back in with their parents and working at a gas station or something. it makes me sick to think that's where i could be in a few months.

my dad has told me he was in the same situation as me when he was out of high school but decided against it and that he hasn't regretted it. if i don't join i feel like i will always wonder what could have been and what i could have accomplished.
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  #2  
Old 05-11-2009, 03:55 PM
michael1976 michael1976 is offline
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Personally, I'd probably tell my parents ahead of time. If you're resolute in your decision then someone trying to change your mind wont affect your decision. It sometimes helps to have the benefit of anothers perspective in large decisions like this- and your parents may feel like they've had a hand in your decision if you talk through it with them. They may give you some good things to consider before you pull the trigger (as it were.)

The military is, in my opinion, a very good way to shift many things in your life into focus; as a springboard to a productive life and an all around better 'you' it is second to none. By the time you've finished your enlistment you'll likely have a much better idea about what you want out of life and how to go about getting it. There's also the added benefit of being in really good shape physically when you graduate basic
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  #3  
Old 05-11-2009, 04:04 PM
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JBizo JBizo is offline
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There are pro's and con's to either way you do it. Telling them before will help you make an objective decision. Your parents will argue why you shouldn't and you will rebuttal with why you should. By the end of the discussion, if you feel your points are more valid than theirs, then you know you have made the right decision.

If you tell them afterward you escape the second guessing yourself and at that point your parents will only be able to support you. Although, you may miss out on some key points they would have made in their arguement, which may have swayed your decision.

Personally, I told my parents right before I went to MEPS the second time to sign my contract. Reason being, because when I was 21 I wanted to join the Marines and they yelled and screamed until I gave in and dropped the idea. Obviously, I am older now and that tactic wouldn't have worked, I still wanted to let them know before it was "official". They yelled and screamed anyway, but after I explained my side of it, they quietted down and support me...even if they do jab at me here and there to try and get me to quit.
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  #4  
Old 05-12-2009, 03:20 PM
StrawberryShortcake StrawberryShortcake is offline
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Tell them before, don't just shock your parents after you've sworn in... Wouldn't be too nice..
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  #5  
Old 05-12-2009, 05:48 PM
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lilyOhio lilyOhio is offline
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i think i'll just go through the whole thing, keep mentioning it to my parents, and see how they feel after I have been moved back in with them for a while, lol. I'll probably tell them once I have done everything but sign, and tell them, I am about to do this, what are your thoughts. I am one of those people that once my mind is made up I know it, and I know I will do something, no matter what. i just want them to be supportive and proud to have their daughter in the army
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  #6  
Old 05-12-2009, 11:45 PM
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Fireball Fireball is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by lilyOhio View Post
so i think i have made up my mind to enlist. i am going to wait till the end of summer to actually sign everything, give myself time to finish school and have some time off, all that good stuff. but i am debating whether to tell my parents before or after. they know i am considering it, and they are skeptical and concerned, to say the least. i promised my dad i would wait to make a decision, but i think i am going back to the recruiter after graduation in june and tell him i want to seriously start the enlistment process.

should i tell them now and have them try to convince me not to, or just do it and tell them i am a soldier once i have sworn in? i am sure they will support me no matter what i do, but i know they think i am taking the "easy way out" which i don't see as the case at all. i just need a change in my life and to feel like i am doing something with myself. if i don't join i will be one of the thousands of '09 grads moving back in with their parents and working at a gas station or something. it makes me sick to think that's where i could be in a few months.

my dad has told me he was in the same situation as me when he was out of high school but decided against it and that he hasn't regretted it. if i don't join i feel like i will always wonder what could have been and what i could have accomplished.
If you feel they would support you then I would go ahead and tell them. To me, that seems like the mature thing to do. Just state your reasons, acknowledge their concern, and let them know that although you respect their views - this is what you feel you need to do. Invite them to come watch you be sworn in... good luck!
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  #7  
Old 05-18-2009, 04:45 PM
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airbornerangerson airbornerangerson is offline
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do whatever feels best to you. good luck
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  #8  
Old 05-18-2009, 04:49 PM
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JBizo JBizo is offline
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I have a fun idea. You have a friend call them and act like they are calling from the London Coroners Office. A young female has been found burned to ashes in an abandoned warehouse, identified only by dental records, and that young female is you. There is no use for coming to ID the body as it is no more than ash and bone.

The following day, telephone them from a private number and tell them that you're alive and well but you've joined the Army. They can't be anything but over joyed then!
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  #9  
Old 05-20-2009, 04:34 PM
theSteve theSteve is offline
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i would tell my parents, i know how you feel except i told my mom when i had decided to join once out of high school and im still a junior. obviously it was a bit to early cuz now my sisters keep on buggin me about it so chose the right time. anyway, it would be the best to do it. its uncomfortable but worth it. who knows, maby you'll learn something new, i learned my mom almost joined the canadian army.
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